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Ctrl+F5 on Life

Sometimes I get so accustomed to being at a computer that I instinctively want to apply certain toolbar functions to my life--"Undo" comes up frequently, along with "Back," and oh the situations I could "Copy" and "Paste" at work to save myself time. But most recently I had a need to "Refresh."

I've been training at a pretty rigorous pace (for me) in the past few months, hoping to increase my strength and maintain my endurance before I begin my marathon training next month. While I was accomplishing these goals and feeling the results of my hard work, the unintended consequence was that I began to feel worn down before my real training even began. I dragged myself out of bed last Sunday to go for my weekly "long" run (which hasn't been very long lately), and I felt as though my legs were wrapped in weights. I just couldn't will my body to go any faster or any farther than six miles, which I struggled to complete. AND I felt the return of my once-nagging shin pain in one leg. This was particularly troubling as I had spent the majority of last summer's marathon training in great pain with shin splints, and I definitely did not want a repeat of that experience. Add to that the left-side piriformis pain that has been present since last summer, and a new, or possibly progressed, pain behind my right knee, and I knew it was time for a break.

So, in an attempt to "refresh" my body, since I couldn't just hold Ctrl+F5 on the keyboard, I decided to not run for a week. This was a poorly timed decision, as National Running Day, June 6, happened to be during this week, and I had signed up for a race this Friday, the Oldsmar 5k Beer Run. And as much as I struggled to not give in to these activities, I knew it was more important to stick to my plan of healing. And while a week of abstaining from running may not be a cure-all for everything that ails me, I'm at least giving my body a chance, a breather, a respite.

I've maintained a fairly low level of fitness this week, which is difficult to adjust to in a dietary and time sense. I had a little breakdown last night after deciding to not go to CrossBoot (which would have involved some running plus high-impact exercises). I even went so far in my head as to ask that existential question, "What is my life purpose??" And then I calmed down and practiced some of the Ashtanga Yoga Primary Series in my living room, which once came as easily to me as breathing, but last night I had to refer to my book to recall the sequence of poses. I felt better after this, less panicked, and a bit relieved to know that I could break my regular pattern of training and still be OK.

My hope is that, after this complete week of rest and focus-shifting, I'll be able to move "Forward."


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