Skip to main content

MCM14 Training, Week 8: Ugh

Date
Workout
Miles
Avg Pace
Monday, 9/1Regular Run5.259:35
Tuesday, 9/2Rest0--
Wednesday, 9/3Regular Run109:53
Thursday, 9/4Regular Run79:48
Friday, 9/5Rest0--
Saturday, 9/6Long Run2.39:26
Sunday, 9/7Rest0--

Total Weekly Mileage: 24.55

This past week not did not end up the way I'd hoped it would. Although it started strong, with high mileage weekday runs and little pain, by the time Friday rolled around, my foot was hurting more than usual. I hoped it was a fluke. I went to bed Friday night and hoped a good night's sleep would have me feeling better in the morning and ready to conquer 20 miles.


That did not happen. I met my friend Nicole for an early warm-up mile, and that mile didn't feel great. I couldn't decide whether I should just quit there or try to start with the group and hope for the best. Nicole reminded me that I bailed on her this same time of year last year, around her birthday, because I felt like I was going to pass out. So I felt guilty enough to at least attempt doing the run. But after another mile in, I could tell it was going to cause further problems for my foot, so I had to stop. I went back home and slept for a long time. I decided I needed to take some more time off. And I haven't done a damn thing since. I've slept in (i.e., not gotten up early to run) four days in a row now, and I'm starting to feel depressed. I don't know what I'll be able to do in the next couple of days, let alone come marathon time. I halfway want to just go out and run and see what happens. 


The very frustrating thing about this bursitis diagnosis is that I can't tell how much worse it might get if I do run, and then I don't know if it would be worthwhile to try to push through the pain so I can meet my training/marathon goals. However, it was only months ago that I had to take a six-week hiatus so I could heal. I don't want to do that again. I guess I'm in a place of not wanting to accept that I'm hurt. Running has given me so much confidence and positive perspective; yet, when I don't have it, I feel just awful. I keep saying I'll get on my bike and ride, and even though I've pumped my tires and set out all my bike gear, I just can't make myself get on it and go. Perhaps I just have too much going on in my life right now--too much change already about to happen to focus on something new (more on that in a later post). I'm trying to have a better perspective; after all, this is not a catastrophe--it's very, very far from it. I still have much that I am able to do and many people who love me. Thank goodness for that.

Comments

People Liked to Read...

Surgery Chronicles: Start Here

I alluded in my last post to upcoming foot surgeries I'd soon be posting about. I'm now 19 days away from the first one, and my thoughts pretty constantly revolve around how my life will change after that when I wake up from my "twilight" sleep after the first operation. In my best frame of mind, the scenario is like this: I'll spend a few weeks out of commission, getting some forced rest, spend a few weeks in a boot, limited exercise, and my right foot will be recovered. Then I repeat on the left foot and by fall I'm back on my feet again. That's the Twitter version. But the version that most often plays out in my head is more like a volume of books, with the details of every day painstakingly planned, agonized over, and wondered about. How will I make food? Bathe? Focus on work? Get the mail, take out the trash, do laundry? Will I be in a lot of pain? Will I go crazy during my long days isolated at home? Will people forget about me? Will I get the resul…

Surgery Chronicles: Two Weeks Down

At the end of week two, I'm home on my own and feeling pretty good. But it definitely feels like time has moved slowly. Hopefully the coming weeks will go by a little faster, now that I'm set up for a routine and able to do more for myself.
First Follow-up I had my first follow-up appointment last week, which I'd been looking forward to pretty much since the day after surgery. Possibly because I was anticipating it so much, it felt like it would never come. But it did, and it went very well. I got my bulky dressing and "upper foot" cast off, and I finally saw my new foot! Of course, it wasn't beautiful; it was still tinted orange from the betadine used in surgery prep, it was swollen and a little bruised, and my incision was still healing and had strips of medical tape running along it (I'll save a barefoot photo for a later post). But my bunion was gone and my toe was aligned! That was the goal, and it was achieved.

The doctor said it only looked like I …

2017 and Beyond

If this sounds like a very late new year resolutions post, that's because it is. I never quite finished expounding on my goals for the year, but I wrote 10 things down, so I figure it's worth posting. Plus, I'm going to have lots of cause to post more in the coming months, as I (plan to) chronicle my upcoming foot surgeries, so I may as well resurrect the blog now.I started out last year's resolutions post saying, "This past year was one of the most challenging years of my life." But 2016 has proven to be a hearty rival. The year was heavily mixed with positive and negative events, emotions all over the place. The good: I ran again, I swam, I came back to yoga, I wrote a lot (just not here), I blossomed at work, I loved my family hard. The bad: I injured myself again and couldn't run, I gave up on biking (but later picked it back up), I floundered trying to find purpose, I distanced myself from friends, and I nearly drowned in my anxiety. But I tried, in …